Being a service worker comes with some perks and the occasional employee discount –but out of all of the cleaning, cooking and servicing, it can be said without a doubt that there is one thing that service workers should learn to love and adore above all: THE CUSTOMER.
The law of customer service says that if you treat them right, they come back and spend more. The customer always stays selfless and mature, especially when they have somewhere to be. Due to these many, many virtues, the simple consumer is in reality a being on a higher plane of morality and civility. To put the customer’s absolute righteousness on full display, here is an example of their upright behavior.
Picture this: you are a barista at your local Starbucks and you have had a rigorous, hours-long shift. After making what felt like thousands of drinks, you swear to yourself that if one more middle aged woman orders an idiotic modified drink, you’re gonna crash out hard.
Suddenly, a gray Honda Odyssey pulls up to the drive-thru.
“Welcome to Starbucks, how can I help you to–?”
“Non-dairy, salted caramel cream cold brew, extra shot, espresso, 2 pumps sugar-free vanilla with almond milk… and extra cinnamon on top!” a woman screeches back at you.
As she orders, the list of added modifications scrolls down the drive-thru screen seemingly without end as your soul almost leaves your body. The car pulls forward as the countless add-ons dance in your head.
Was it two pumps of caramel syrup and one pump of vanilla or the other way around? you think as you scramble to prepare the abomination of sugar and caffeine.
Like a chef in a Michelin-star kitchen, you get to work crafting, brewing, and concocting the beverage. Two pumps of this, a pump of that, a shot of this, and voila! The drink was made to the exact specification – but wait, is it Kaitlin with an I or Kaitlyn a Y? Either way, you pick the Y and with your best fake smile hand the drink over.
“I have seven gift cards with $1.50 each, can I pay with those?”
As your fake smile becomes even more forced, you “kindly” accept her request and scan one, two, three, four, five, six, and finally seven gift cards.
“You’re fifty cents short ma’am,” you say.
“Oh, I had this $25 gift card as well,” she replies and hands you yet another gift card she easily could have used from the start. As you hand her the beverage, you wish her well with her outrageous drink and move on to the next customer.
Suddenly, out of the corner of your eye, you see the same gray Honda Odyssey slowly pull up to the window.
“Hello, how can I–”
“Excuuuse me,” you hear a shrill voice say through the drive-thru, “I would like to speak to a manager, because one of these STUPID employees spelled my name with a Y. I cannot believe the audacity of these workers to spell MY name with a Y, when it’s clearly spelled with an I.”
From this example, it’s pretty easy to say that the customers are clearly misunderstood and obviously in the right in this situation. Will there ever be a remedy to the constant woe of mucked up drinks and messed up names? Seriously, it’s pretty obvious that her name was spelled with a Y and not an I. How can we fix this never ending issue? Until we can replace all the workers with robots and kiosks, I guess we’ll never know.
